Chris reflects on his journey and the purpose he found in Shared Reading groups.
My childhood was lonely. I felt out of place everywhere. I did not belong. Not at school, in my family, or with any group of friends. I yearned for a place where I could rest and be myself, where my differences were respected and celebrated. I have always sought to fit in somewhere.
What’s more, because I know the deep wound that loneliness opens up inside, I detest seeing other people go through it. I was always looking for ways to help myself and others feel less alone. If I see someone being excluded or ignored I feel an unbearably tender anguish that has its roots deep in the way that I have felt in my life. I feel this so acutely that I often feel moved to do something.
I have felt like this from a young age. It was an intuition I guess, that no one should feel alone, that everyone should have someone to share things with. Now, thanks to much research, we know that loneliness is actually very bad for our health. It raises blood pressure, increases risk of illness and makes mental health issues much worse. Thanks to the campaign to end loneliness in the UK, we know that loneliness is as bad for us as smoking 15 cigarettes a day.
More people than ever report chronic loneliness in our communities. Families live apart, neighbours are more distant than they once were, and life is lived quickly these days. People find it hard to get beyond a surface connection with others.
What’s more, loneliness is difficult to alleviate. It’s not a case of simply being with other people. Many people feel lonelier when around others. Loneliness is when your need for connection goes unmet. It’s about the quality of connection you have. So, what if you could do something to improve the quality of connection that people experience? To alleviate those hard feelings? What if you could give people hope?
Shared Reading is an activity that gets to the heart of this wicked problem. By using a story to begin a discussion we can go deeper quicker. We can get beyond small talk and have real conversations, conversations that hit us where we feel most alone.
Shared Reading facilitation is about enabling people to slow down and explore each others perspective. It’s about listening to each other. It’s about slowly building the confidence for people to tell their own story. By using literature we can give voice to thoughts and feelings that are trapped inside, and share them easily with others. We are seen, heard, perhaps for the first time.
Carl Jung said...
“Loneliness does not come from having no people about one, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to oneself.”
As a Shared Reading facilitator, I am able to help people to communicate the things that feel important to them. I can promote a world in which more people feel a sense of wonder, belonging and hope for the future. I can help people create more engagement in life, improve mental health and ensure that people feel less alone.
And the best thing is, I'm not the only one who can do it. If you enjoy reading, like people, and want to make a difference in the world, why not consider becoming a Shared Reading facilititor too. I am now a qualified Shared Reading trainer and have trained many others to run their own Shared Reading groups in their communities, in their workplaces and for a range of different locations and organisations.
If this story has made you even just a little but curious or interested in becoming a Shared Reading group facilitator, I'd be very happy to talk with you more about what it's like and what's involved. So please get in touch. I'd love to hear from you.
If you are feeling distressed or in need of support, please call Lifeline on 13 11 14. Their trained support workers are available 24 hours 7 days a week. Or discuss your concerns with your GP or mental health practitioner.
If you would like to find out more about our existings groups or becoming a group facilitator you can find more information on our website, call Chris on 0468 346 834 or email chris@sharedreadingnsw.com
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